Just another day at the Office...

So it’s one thing to chose the person to see every day, but it’s another thing to pretty much get stuck with someone every day. Such is the difference between being married and going to work. Being married, I CHOSE to life my life out for better or worse with Alfie going to work I don't really get a say who I spend my 40+ hours with, which means it can lead to some fun times (if your coworkers are rad) or some dreadful times (if your peeps are sucky). For me I have a bit of both id say about 80/20 for the fun/sucky ratio, there may or may not be a fly in the fun ointment at work. Same person that I yikes, got in trouble.

BUT regardless of if I enjoy or don't enjoy my direct coworkers, I share a building with other people that I DO NOT work with but still share an area with. Which can be cause for crappiness....So this little story happened a bit ago. Alfie and I had ordered pizza one night and with the delicious leftovers I wrapped them up and took them to work the following day. Now normally I toss my lunch into a Wegmans bag to put in the fridge at work, but on that day I just had the 2 slices in a Ziploc. I got to work and placed my pieces (they were fresh looking pepperoni and mushroom slices...my favorite) on the middle rack with a small thing of carrots I had also brought in a Ziploc beside it. Noon came and went as did 1pm (which is when the cafeteria closes) and I finally wandered over to grab my lunch. I opened the door and didn’t readily see my slices. Hmmm no biggie, it probably got shuffled around as people took their lunches out. So I hunkered down to search for it. I found my carrots tossed to the side but no pizza. after 5 mins of frantically looking, I came to the conclusion that some jerk ate my lunch. COME ON! I was soooo looking forward to it. Then to make matters worse on the top shelf were these 2 ratty looking freezer burned slices that I can only imagine the Pizza thief left me, which of course I did not eat, cause that would be just nasty. But it made me think... who does that? Just because it’s in the communal fridge does not make it open to all. Oh and this is just the beginning. There are the people who like to bring NASTY smelling food for lunch and turn the entire building into a stink bomb in the form of "lets re-heat last night’s fish dinner today at work" and you pretty much pray that you don't leave work reeking of fish. I’m sorry but last time I checked, I didn't okay you to rape my nostrils with your awful smelling food. Thanks a lot.

What kind of people are in your office? Do any of these folks sound familiar....?

Mr. Social - We ALL know him. He is the guy who knows everyone, busts everyone’s balls, has ALL the good gossip and can't keep a secret to save their life. They spend a good chunk of their morning hopping from cubicle to cubicle, finding out what the good word is and what’s new. They are ALWAYS up for a good time via happy hour or lunch out and even better, they are usually the one with the creepy "I think I am hot stuff" Facebook profile.

Ms. Sour Puss- Yeah she is the Debbie Downer of the group. The one who nothing is ever quite good enough. "What there are free cookies and cake two cubes down??" "Oh well I am diabetic, I can't eat that" WAAA. WAA She is the one who usually takes a fun afternoon and turns it into a rainy blah day. And you try very hard to avoid so she doesn't poo all over your pleasant day.

Mr. You can't frazzle Me - he is the guy that nothing EVER gets too. "What there is a HUGE deadline tomorrow 9am??" "Yeah yeah ill get to it, no worries, i'll come in at 8 and pound that out." He is usually the one to cut corners and just get by. I’m guessing he was the stoner in high school and college. Ever the laid back guy.

Mr. Corporate Intern - They are the youngsters you kind of wanna punch in the face, cause they come in and throw around lame corporate phrases like synergy and diversification and have no idea what they are talking about but walk around with the biggest chip on their shoulder like they are the shizz. They wanna climb the corporate ladder and get to the top floor with the corner office, and is way way obnoxious.

Miss Corporate Intern - Not the friendliest of office folk. She is usually dressed like a skankasaurous and reallllly doesn’t do much around the office other than look cute and get hit on by dirty old men (but primarily by Mr. Social). Also known as Ms Giggles, since she pretty much laughs at anything as she flirtatiously touches the jokesters arm.

Mr. Jesus Freak - Usually some sort of religious base that is VERY vocal about judging people and telling them how their life is wrong and how they are going to hell. Pretty much gives any sort of a Christian a bad name and people generally avoid for fear of long winded awkward conversation about salvation. (So sad, that how the office Christian is usually seen)

Mrs. I love my 10 Cats - She is the weird lady. ya know the one who brings the same meal to lunch every day and put pictures up in her cubicle of her kittens and bunnies. She talks about Mr. Whiskers like he is her son and her evening usually revolves around Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. Smells heavily of some musky perfume, rocks killer orthopedic sneakers or the ever awful popular Crocs. Usually a slow stroller that you DON'T want to be caught behind if you are rushing to get to the ladies room.

Ms. Menopausal - Gotta love her. You can easily find her by the tell tale fan at her cubicle desk pointed right at her while she wears sleeveless and fans herself (while everyone else is in sweaters). She is often the Man Hater, burned once in her past by some ex-husband and is great at shootin the breeze and bustin balls with Mr. Social. Has a great raspy smokers laugh and enjoys a good strong scotch the end of the day.

LOL And for those who wonder, yes, most of those are based on real people, and No I do not fall into ANY of those categories :P ...Do you??