Lets go Hunting....Goodwill Hunting

IM BACK!! The blogging vacation is over, and I lived through a birthday, a bachelorette and a wedding. Phew! Let the relaxation begin. Anyways, here is my latest confession....

Confession: I am obsessed with thrift stores.

I kid you not. And not just for home items to revamp. I mean for clothes... for me! When I was unemployed a few years ago, shopping for clothes was pretty much out of the picture. Until I figured out my little shopping secret: Thrift stores. Ya huh! Goodwill, Savers, Plato’s Closet, Garage Sales. No place is off limits. Since then I hadn't dabbled in my thrift store shopping too much, until recently (ok since having Colton and realizing nothing fits like it used to) and now I am mildly addicted.

There is something to be said about getting such steals on clothes. Maybe it’s the cheapy inside me or the thrill of the hunt, but I LOVE searching through the racks to find previously owned gems at a fraction of what it would normally cost. I love it!! And the best part is that people never (until now) know that I love to shop there. Think what you will of me, but I have no problem wearing something owned by someone else (especially when it costs $3.99 and looks brand new or even has the tags on it). Just last week I had been on the hunt for some skinny belts to wear over some cardigans. I checked the mall and was VERY bummed to see places wanted 9.99+ for a tiny little belt. Try again! I knew I could do better than that price. Enter Savers (ahhhhh the heavens open and shined upon me bargains galore) Not only did I grab a black skinny belt for a mere buck ninety nine BUT I also snagged a royal blue cardigan (to wear with that lovely purchased belt for $3.99) AND a skinny braided brown belt(1.99). WHAT WHAT?? I love deals like that!

Then last night stumbled into my old friend Goodwill (it had been a while with the new Savers hogging my attention right around the block). Giving myself a $10 challenge I scoured the racks for a good hour and ended up with 3 lovely nuggets: a camel/brown striped scoop neck sweater (Old Navy), a grey and green striped boyfriend cardigan (Mossimo) and a navy/white (Jcrew) striped top (I love me some stripes, especially under jackets!) and the grand total was.....$10.37 HOLLA. I think I made out great!! And since I am VERY selective when I thrift for myself (especially the tops) to made sure they were in good/new condition (FYI -jeans, dress pants, blazers, jackets also make great thrift store buys) I was quite impressed with my purchases!!

One of the things I have found in my close thrifting adventures, is that searching for classic pieces by well made companies are key. I am still kicking myself over this amazing white blazer from Nine West and was under $10 and looked BRAND NEW, but it was a tad bit snug. Knowing I planned to lose more weight I should have bought it cause it would have fit perfectly now. Drat, oh well, lesson learned. I find it also helps to have brands memorized, so I know when I see Mossimo it’s from Target, Faded Glory from Wal-Mart, Apt. 9 from Kohl’s, and so on and it helps to decipher how good of a deal I am actually getting. $7 from a Mossimo item, not a great deal, since I could probably get it brand new for the same price at the store. But $2.99 now that is something I just might snag. As a personal rule, anything under 5.99 is typically a clothing bargain for me, since the majority of retail stores rarely have much below that. The only "problem" I run into is that it makes regular shopping tricky. I have a hard time spending at normal stores cause I know, "well I am sure I can find something similar in my closet Savers or Goodwill for WAY less" although I guess that’s not really a "problem" to have, now is it?? Lol

Oh and did you know they run deals? That’s right, last night at Goodwill was 50%off anything with a purple ticket (mine were all blue... bummer) Savers does a Monday night 25% off AND has a Savers card similar to a shoppers club card like at Wegmans.


Anyone else out there enjoy the thrill of the thrifting hunt? I tell you, once you start, and realize the clothing/home/baby gems to be found, you will be kicking yourself for not trying this sooner :)

To Whom it may Concern....

I have a few people I would like to speak to so here we go....

Dear People-who-sit-in-the-left-lane,
MOVE OVER. There are 2 other lanes that you can sit in and go 55, preferably the one farthest to the right. You are not the police, so there for don't think you are "doing me a favor" by forcing me to stick to the 55 speed limit. How about you do yourself a favor and move on over.

Dear Bicycle riders,
*sigh* Stay off the road. FOR REAL. Unless you are legit and semi pro, stay off the main roads with your tight spandexy tops and thigh hugging spandexy shorts. Oh and to the lady out for her afternoon bike ride with her dang little basket on the front handles swerving all into the road, one day someone is going to hit you and it will be all your fault...just saying.

Dear New Boyz Band,
I don't appreciate your song saying "I look better with the lights off", even if you do precede that statement by making sure "I don't take it the wrong way", it still bugs me. Because I for sure, don't want someone to tell me that I look better when they can't see me, or when I am in low lighting, or when I am out of focus, or when they have one eye shut and squinting with the other.

Dear Old people and Stay-at-home-ers or It’s-my-vacation-day people,
Stay out of my work commute! The roads between the hours of 7:30 - 9 and 4 -6 are mine!! You can have the rest of the day on the roads. I already have to deal with those dang busses and slow moving truckers. Your "I’m not rushing to get to work" speed is noticeable and your I’m not used to the traffic frequent braking is doing a number on my gas tank and pissing everybody else who is driving off! So enjoy an extra cup of coffee and give us a few hours before leaving the house.

Dear Old people at work,
I get I am YEARS younger than you but referring to me as "young lady" comes off sounding age-ist. If you want I can refer to you as gramps, or Old Man River, or Sir to keep things even. And while you’re at it, quit talking about retirement. I get it, you have one foot out the door, but keep in mind that the other foot is pretty close to the grave...so there. Plus, I am tired of listening to how FARRR away from retirement I am. Yeah, I know I’m gonna be working for the next 30 years!

Dear Kimi,
Freakin’ finish planning Colton's birthday, would ya!? Its only 2 weeks away. Time. Is. Ticking. Oh yeah and get them pictures printed and up, the fireplace painted and the floral room straightened up too while you’re at it! Don't forget to hang the mirror and the calendar, and go ahead and paint the fireplace room too when you get a second!

Dear Ladies,
Sometimes looking good means suffering a bit. To look nice is not always comfortable. So deal with it.

To the old man who flicked me off the other day,
I was in MY lane pulling up to the stop light. YOU were cutting into my lane. I so did not deserve that knobby arthritic attempt at a flick off. You were in the wrong, not me. PLUS you car wasnt anything special...just sayin'

And finally…
To Sonos, of the Sing-off,
You deserved to go home after that horrendous Jackson 5 slaughtering of "I want you back". Nobody messes with that song and gets to make it to the next level... so Adios!! You deserved to go home.

MMM MMM Giiiirl You too old!

A friend of mine let’s call her Shaniqua (LOL - ya like that? person-whose-name-isn't-really-Shaniqua?) shared this story with me...

Shaniqua was at a WORK party (Luau themed) and a co-worker, let’s call her Croc-y (you'll understand why, later) showed up at the party. Shaniqua said Croc-y was dressed in the luau theme but missing 1 MAJOR necessary article of clothing. Any guesses?? No? It was: a bra. That’s right A. BRA. Really NO BRA?!?!?!?!?! to a work event?!?!?! Risky! or should I say risqué...lol. Who does that?! In addition to the coral bra-less deep v sundress outfit thingy, Croc-y was ALSO rockin' (Haha Crocodile rock...) coral crocs!! CORAL CROCS! I didn't even know they made those, which probably means they shouldn't have made them. But Shaniqua confirmed that yes they do, and yes homegirl did! Tisk tisk (I am anti crocs anyways, but that’s me). Apparently Croc-y is known around the office for wearing her Crocs in every color! Who does that?! I guess now she can be known for something else....Ms. I-didn't-wear-a-bra-to-a-work-event. I get if you have tick tacs/mosquito bites that going without a lady lump-holder is probably fine and unnoticeable but anything bigger than that MOST DEFINITELY needs a support system. And anyone over the age of puberty shoulllllld sport some kind of tata holder. But I’m sure some people of the breastfully unblessed camp would say that’s untrue and i guess they would probably know more about that than this Mountain-liscious momma.

But anyways, this little story made me think...What is age appropriate? Is letting the gals hang free age appropriate? Can grammie go free just as much as some 15 year old? Or maybe in this instance its size related! How long can one shop in the "juniors" department? Can any age wear the "current trends" both in hair and clothing? Just like Simon from American Idol ALWAYS complained when young contestants sang old people songs, so do I complain when old people wear young people clothes and vice versa. So to help you determine if "mmm mmm Giiiirl You too OLD", here are myy top 5 rules….

You know you too old when:
- The trend you wore once makes its way back again. Ex those of us who rocked side ponytails in the 80's, scrunchies, fanny packs (sweet Lord, I actually saw Target trying to sell "cute" versions. It’s a lie, there is NO cute way to wear a freakin fanny pack!!) STAY AWAY from them now!
- You try an outfit on and make sure it doesn’t give you camel toe. The fact alone that you A. know what camel toe is and B. you check for it, means you are too old to wear that outfit (cause it probably will give you C.T.)
- If you have no idea who Snookie is and where she is from, you have no biznass wearing her beloved poof.
- You think crocs are an acceptable form of shoe, it’s not. Its sooo not. (Unless you are in the medical field or a small child...lol...again my opinion, I hate them)
- And finally, if you read these and ACTUALLY thought to abide by them, you are too old, because young people could care less what anyone says :)

Happy Tuesday!

I'll try...

Confession: I don't want to be "that mom".

Lets start out with a story shall we....

So the other weekend, fourth of july weekend to be exact, I was working on repainting our kitchen cabinets from the yucky shade of cream, to a refreshing shade of white....or should i say "Glass of Milk" as it was cleverly named (soy milk would fit better for us since we are lactites, but oh well)

Side note: when i paint i wear anything, usually shorts or pajamas but i have this habit of wiping off mistakes (like floor drips or a piece of hair or dirt in the painted piece) and wiping them onto my legs or arms. Which means that whatever i am wearing ends up nicely covered, especially my skin. No biggie I figure if i put in on bare skin its easier to remove because it comes off with a good scrub in the shower. Although it also means it remains on my body UNTIL i shower, which can sometimes be problematic...

Anyways, i was painting late thursday night and ended up running into Target early friday morning...sans shower (yeah mama be groady like that). I think i was even still in my jammies top with jean capris [cringe. i know, who does that?!?] Did i mention my hair was curly and nappily thrown up into a high gross bun with frizzes everywhere....oye. So here i am looking like trash when don't i see my supervisor from work. And instead of realizing how awful i look and avoiding him, I literally seek him out. WHAT?! yeah i know, not a shining moment. Its not until mid conversation that it dawns..."Sweet Lord, i am a hot mess". i quickly end the convo, grab my baby items i came in for and head home. One would think i learned my lesson that morning but no, no i did not. After painting yet again that afternoon in the hot garage and adding new paint marks to my legs and arms (and probably sweat marks too), i take Colty with me and AGAIN head into target. Dumb dumb dumb move. Because who ELSE do i run into?? Only the manager to the program manager at work. I can't be rude so I stop and say hello, realizing the whole time that i look 100xs worse than i did that morning.And that i am going to have to do some wayyyy cute outfit on monday to redeam myself!! Lesson Learned!

Anyways, that situation has solidified a goal i have made for myself. To be that momma who tries. Who doesn't live in sweats and a hoodie, who puts on make up and looks good even if she doesn't want to, and even if it is just a quick trip to target or wegmans. To take the extra few minutes to put on earrings or a necklace even though Colton may try everything to rip it off everytime, or even if he succeeds (he totally ripped off an earring and broke it, bummer, oh well perfect excuse to get a new one :)). I don't want to be that momma that people look at and think "poor thing has let herself go". Which believe me is way too easy to get stuck in because just finding time to get a shower in is a challenge, let alone time to give myself a good hair blow out AND flat iron my hair, tweeze my bushman prone eye browns OR even shave my legs. But I am making it a goal to put myself together daily, to shed all the baby weight (thankfully this is done! Holla! [do people still say holla?]), to do my hair AND my makeup. Why? Because nothing is worse than feeling like you look like crap compared to everyone else.I can hear some of you baby free gals thinking "you should be doing that anyways", and inside i chuckle for you, because just you wait...ohh just you wait (all you busy mamas are nodding your head and pursing your lips right along with me), LOL So here is my challenge to all you mommas (and ladies in general).... lets try. Lets try to do our hair instead of tossing it into a bun, ponytail (adios, i will miss you my daily go-to style), pig tails, braids whatever. Lets put on a cute outfit instead of sweats and a tshirt. Lets put ourselves anywhere but dead last. Not only for our husbands or our children or the general public that looks at our thrown together self, but lets do it for us, because with all our hard work, we deserve to look MORE than half decent, we deserve to look Fantasmo!!

This is how we do....

Confession: this is how i put together an outfit...

**Side Note: I lOOOOVE clothes and all things clothes related, like shoes and jewelry and scarves and etc. And on the occasion i get asked by friends to help put together or shop for an outfit, so i thought i would share the tips I use when putting together something to wear. And this BY NO MEANs makes me an expert on what to wear because, HAVE YA SEEN ME?!?! I definitely have my “what was she thinking” moments and I am sure I could land on the “Worst Dressed” List , but I don’t mind. This is fashion and I am learning as I go!! Ok, so right, back to my tips on how i put together an outfit...

1. Start with a look: Sexy, business casual, comfy, dramatic etc. Use this to stay on focus when looking through your wardrobe. It helps to ask, does this feel _____? (whatever the look is chosen?) or “would _______ wear this?” (enter name of person who makes you think of the look you are going for)

2. Do your research: Find photos of people that you think emulate that style and take note of what they are wearing. Is it a color or an article of clothing that conveys that look? Is it the hair or shoes that complete it? Did they play up one thing and down play something else? What was it about the outfit that made you stop and notice?

3. Pick what looks good on you: Even I struggle with this. I am often tempted to pick something based on the latest fad, instead of choosing something that I KNOW looks good and works with my body type. So make sure to stear clear of things that although are the current trend, may not look good on you. Example, I have a super short waist, large chest and long legs. So a big belt worn around my middle looks gross on me because it actually hides any waist I have! So i try to stay away from it. But V-necks tend to look really good on me or even the “cross boob” style (no not the official name, but I bet you know what I am talking about) so I like to wear those!

4. Pick a statement ______: this could be a color/color scheme, a necklace, a headband, an article of clothing, a belt, a funky scarf, a pair of snazzy shoes, ANYTHING!! Let your imagination and mood run wild here!

5. Play up that statement piece: Let the item from #3 be what people notice about your outfit. Did you buy a bold funky necklace or scarf? Play that up by downplaying the rest…simple top, maybe a cute jacket, jeans and simple jewelry. Or a fun hat and neutral top with jeans. Or maybe a bright Kelly green top with gorgeous white jeans love it!

6. Be confident: if you get the rest wrong, then get this one right. Because who cares if people like what you have on, if you like it and it makes you feel good, then GIRLLLLL ROCK IT!!

Disclaimer: No, I don’t do this everyday for everyoutfit, or else I would look far more put together than I do, BUT on the days I have time, yes, those 6 steps are my thought process. And next time you see me go ahead and ask what my “statement something” or my “outfit inspiring look” was, and see if I have an answer for you!

**As an additional tidbit, what has saved me TONS of money is to shop when I am don’t need to. Yeah I know sounds counterintuitive but bear with me. If I wait to shop until I NEED an outfit then chances are I will spend an entire weekend combing the racks and spend 10xs more to get my outfit then if I just pick up great sale items as I see them. For example the other week I got 2 great necklaces for $4 each! Now sure I probably didn’t need them BUT when the time came to look for a funky piece of jewelry I didn’t have to spend $15-$20 bucks on a regular priced item or even settle on a piece that I wasn’t truly in love with. Now I am not encouraging people to go on a shopping binge but I am saying keep your eyes peeled. If you’re at the store and you see a great deal on a dress, think twice, its wedding season, there are a lot of work functions and get-togethers to wear it to, and if you can, grab it. It will save you LOTS of time and LOTS of money because you got it on sale. And then you can gradually build a nice and inexpensive wardrobe!! OH and never underestimate the power of Goodwill. I have purchased MANY a great pair of pants or skirts there and for super duper cheap!!

Love IT!!!

Confession: Im totally crushing on green these days!

Oh not just any green, but the bright Kelly green color. The color of the new baby leaves, and the bright grass and LOTS of new clothes with crisp white tags :) I don't know why (ok, so probably because its totally the "IT" color of the season, just ask Christys celebrity boyfriend, Nate Berkus). But anyways, i am in love! I own NOTHING in that color, but i want to. I love love love how it looks with navy and white. Which are also my two other color crushes these days. Navy is like the summer version of black! I love how it looks with gold jewelry and i love how it looks with yellow. And then there is white don't get me started on how much i adore wearing white. It struts up to you, biotch slaps you, and screams"ITS SUMMER" right in your face. Atleast it does to me! I love a great pair of white pants! Everyone should own a pair, or two. But back to my Kelly green obession... Anyone else loving it too?? Not sure how i will endulge in my new crush, maybe a scarf or a pair of shoes or a simple top?? Who knows! The wallets sky's the limit, right?! I think I am just inspired these days with the nautical style. Anything that can be worn ON A BOAT, lol, (quick chuckle to the Lonely Island Boys "On a Boat" song). Navy, white, yellow, red, gold, green. Crisp, bold, and classic. Nice and fresh and pretty much in my eyes the iconic style of spring and summer. And, I.LOVE.IT. And, I.WILL.WEAR.IT. So keep your eyes peeled for good bargains on Kelly Green items, and report back, okay?! And for those who arent sure what i am talking about, here are two for ya....

Bootcut Denim by Joe's Jeans
Platforms by Charlotte Olympia

Are those shoes not to die for?! and the clutch!! OH the CLUTCH!!

Flats by Tod's
Bracelets by Kate Spade

So fresh and so clean clean!

2 Scoops of vanilla

Side note: So the story goes, a family was waiting for ice cream on a lovely vacation in the mountains, when the ice cream girl turned around to take their order and WHA BAM, two scoops of vanilla flesh hit their eye line (yes folks i am talking about boobs). Now 2 extra side notes.... 1. I believe the "family" was all (or primarily) males and 2. I was not there to confirm the extent to which the "two scoops" were on display. So with that...

Confession: Me and cleavage are bosom buddies.

LOL, not really what you were expecting 'eh, but great play on words! Let me explain. I had a request (shout out to a reader..Leigh, for the post idea...HOLLA) to take on this topic, although in her defense, Im pretttttty sure she would come from the opposite view, but since its a confession, i better be honest, right? I mean, I'm pretty sure I came out of the womb with tatas larger than the average girl should have to deal with and therefore quickly became "comfortable" with "the girls". So i have no problem sporting a bit of 'vage now and again. Now the key word here folks is "bit'o " not the whole sha-bang or the "full scoops" as some people would use. If you see nip...obviously thats WAY too far. But a nice peek of the ladies isn't bad, in my book. And ofourse there are okay places and NOT so okay places to show a lil. Like church and the work place are the two obvious No-No's on where to wear this 'vage, but the mall, clubs and pretty much anywhere else is okay in my book. A lot of people wonder what the "appropriate" amount to show is. Well lucky for me, God gave me a built in cleavage moderator. Christy calls it my "naughty freckle". I have one strategically placed freckle that you can only see when i wear a low cut shirt.... go ahead look for it next time, i dare ya! JK JK JK (seriously just kidding, im gonna watch all eyes and call PERVERT if you look... don't think I wont, cause i will...i totally will!.) Anyways, i say show what you (and your husband) are comfortable with. AND keep in mind that cleavage should also really be age appropriate. (i hear you all "mmmhmmm-ing along with me) Nothing is worse than seeing a cougar at the bar with a low cut shirt, flaunting her i breast-fed-5-children-10years-ago saggers, when she definitely should not! But what if you are not a cougar, you ask?? Well then lets say it should be indirectly proportionate to your OVER 21 age (yes that's right, over 21. If you can't drink, you have no business sporting cleavage, yes i said it.) For those non mathematical folks that means the older you get the less you get to show! So you turn 21 BOOM go for it! You turn 50 BOOM cover it up. I know i know i know, im sure i am going to get a ton of people saying "but what about modesty" and "how about leaving something to the imagination" but in my defense THEY ARE BOOBS, everyone KNOWS ladies have them, its not like if we wore a solid top, they would be hidden, or its not like WOW shocker, wait? She has boobs?? So when you see a bit of them it not like they sprang out from nowhere. So ladies rock em proud if your gonna show some. Go ahead and admire the God-given assets that loads of people pay great money for, that you got natural and you got FREE :)

Leggings Schmeggings....

Confession: IMHO (thats In my honest opinion) leggings aren't pants....

I know, some of you thinking i am crazy and some are nodding along and thinking "thats right girl, preach it". The former can stop reading and the latter can keep going :)

In my defense, i love leggings! I think they are adorable and make for a cute outfit....when.wore.right. lol People, people people... leggings are just glorified stockings!! They are thick, skin tight STOCKINGS!! Just because they are not sheer does not mean we can not see camel toe when your shirt isnt long enough! Nor does it mean that they get to be worn as an alternative to pants. They should be wore as STOCKING alternatives! Would we not cringe if someone wore a cute top and followed it up with spandex bottoms??same thing folks. Here is a good legging vs pants check: ask yourself "if i don't wear anything other than this top, can people see my 'gina??" if the answer is yes, then sorry, you should be wearing real pants. If the answer is no, then go ahead and throw on the leggings and wear 'em proud!! Now lets move to the ever popular "jeggings" (not to be confused with skinny jeans) jean colored tights... again, cute, as long as your camel toe is not flashing loud and proud!! COVER IT ladies!! if you MUST wear a shorter shirt ATLEAST make it cover your butt and lady parts! Same thing goes for jeggings, if you wouldnot wear sheer pantyhose with that top, then nope, jeggings (in my opinion) are not ok. I know a lot of people have jumped on the bandwagon and i have no problem blaming Hollywood and their "anything goes, for anyone" mentality when it comes to dressing. But this one has gotten a bit out of control. Im tired of going to the mall and seeing far too many people in a regular (not extra long) tshirts and leggings or better yet hoodies with leggings and a pair of ugg boots with FULL makeup ( please as if you rolled out of bed with full makeup on...) and the sad part is not all of them are 15yrs old, majority are well above and old enough to know better! Now there are two "exceptions" ....1. excercise gear, aka "yoga pants" , are okay, same concept although generally only worn to the gym and home and occasionally to WegmansWalmart\Tops... we all know you are working out and in a hurry and not trying to look "cute" or make it a "look"... no problem there (unless you are trying to look cute and are trying to make it a look! But thats a whole different blog....) 2. children. Need i say more? Who's with me?!?!

***Sidenote: i have TOTALLY broken the leggings rule, when pregnant! Canal Days comes to mind and the Puerto Rican Parade.... I completely regret the poor choice of a tank top with leggings (actually yoga pants) and a long sleeveless not-sure-what-you-call-it... maybe "back and side fat coverer"?? Anyways, lesson learned on my part!

Yep, i know, it looks good...

Confession: I am having a VERY good hair day!!

Usually with the schedule i have been keeping these days, the ability (and desire) to keep up with my hair has slipped and although i dont look like a Snaggle-puss (new word, i kinda like it!, go ahead and use it...) I do not always look like the well put together mamma I would like to. But last night i remedied that and actually blew dried my hair and this morning after Coltys 4am bottle, when he went back to sleep, i resisted the urge to snuggle in and fall back to sleep and instead plugged in the flat iron, grabbed some clips and when to town. And the result was a SUCCESS. Many compliments today from coworkers (made me kinda wonder if i generally look aweful? lol) but thats ok, i will gladly take the compliment and store it away for a rainy, frizzy, didn't- get- to -shower- so -my -curly- hair- is- in- a -ponytail kind of day. I know you are all wondering what its like, well its the usual flat ironed do with a bit of volume on top and i deepend my side part for a more dramatic look.... WINNING (to quote good old Charlie Sheen).

So, tomorrow is a good friend D.W's (we shall call him for anonymity purposes) birthday. A large group of us are going to the distillery and Mamasita is gonna watch Colty. So since it feels like i haven't been out in FOREVER, i need a GREAT outfit to wear out. I have settled on a white V neck ruffle shirt from NY&Co, jeans, my red DIY necklace and my red heels that i never get to wear, because come on... with a baby i can't quite wear 3 inch heels AND carry a 15lb baby and carseat. Nope, not happening! (still debating on wearing black instead, since its slimming, but the white shirt is really cute! I will let alfie make the final call) Slightly bummed that my 40 in 40 plan is going to limit my eating (and drinking, for that matter) BUT if i can make i through the weekend (this one especially, lots of gatherings where piggingout it the thing to do) then i can easily make it through the next 40 weeks...right? (humor me, ok?!) So all in all todays' great hair day BETTER extend into another good hair day tomorrow (when it counts) cause whats a good outfit if wasted on crappy looking hair, right? Oh well cheers to friday and cheers to a night out with "the crew"...

Ohhh reallly??

So a friend of mine on facebook made a comment about how the female population who wears leggings needs to start wearing shirts that cover their camel toe...AMEN. This got me thinking of all the fashions that irk me. And here they are....

I can't stand those girls at the mall who have the "Thats right, i just rolled outta bed but look this good" but you have a full face of make up on! Yeah guess what girlies, you didnt fool anyone. We know that while you are wearing sweatpants, uggs and a hoodie, you took 30+mins to flat iron your hair THEN throw it up in a messy ponytail/bun thing AND THEN caked on eyeliner, Mascara, eyeshadow, foundation, AND lip gloss. You may have those pubescent, hormone infested boys fooled but the rest of us see past that "look". So come on, take the extra 5 minutes and actually put on an outfit OR skip the makeup and really just roll out of bed and head to the mall!!

Another "favorite" is the "hi i have 5 teenagers and they help pick out my wardrobe" Guess what mom.... you.are.not.a.teen.period. This means that yes you have to suck it up and stop shopping in the Jrs department, or Debs, or Rainbow. Grow old with class and elegance, you look 100times worse trying to stay trendy. Just admit defeat....no you can not wear leggings, or ponchos, or miniskirts. Embrace Ann Taylor Loft, the Limited, or Christopher Banks. Move on into the Misses, Petites or Womens section. Believe me, you will be so thankful when you look back at pictures.

And finally we come to the "hello my butt cheeks and crotch are juuuust about to pop out of these rediculously short shorts" Yeahhhh, I'm sorry but last time I checked we wore clothes over our underwear not just underwear around. It the inseam on a pair of short is virtually non-existant...its too short. Plus you tiny girls set a poor example for the not so tiny girls who also feel they have the right to sport that terrible style. It does not look good in a size 2 and it definitely does not look good in a size 14. Come on chicas! Here is an idea lets keep it in our pants! And by "it" my mean our cooters!! How about we not show everyone our lady parts.

So people lets TRY to think before we dress, so that we do not end up on this site....
www.peopleofwalmart.com

Nerd at heart

Confession: Im really a math nerd at heart. Don't be confused by the fashionista exterior, inside is a math loving, calculator toting mathy. I was on facebook today a those creepy ads along the side of the page that somehow know farrrr too much about me popped up with some t-shirts that were of the math persuasion. So i clicked them and low and behold it turned out to be porn. LOL just kidding it really was a math shirt. This was the one that caught my eye on the ad:

For those that don't get that, the square root of negative one is i. So the clever shirt reads i heart math. (christy i know you are loving that shirt. This next one got me chuckling....


I would totally wear something like this. I once saw a shirt that said "i kiss better than i do math" being worn by a math major such as myself, i thought it would say alot about my lip locking skills.